16 weeks gravid uterus....

We just started ObGyn posting last week, and it was full of suspense..bukan ape, ade palpitations, sweaty palms, shortness of breath, heat intolerance..i thought i might be having hyperthyroidism. but it was not possible because i don't have loss of weight even though I eat A LOT! huhu. then, I found out that the heat intolerance was due to the hot weather in KL and my palpitations, sweaty pals and SOB was just anxious feelings sebab kelas dr R dah nak start. haha

counting days before our elective posting, bestnye, dapat pegi KB. klau dapat pegi oversea mesti best jgk tapi malas nak apply. haha. lgpun malas nak cari tempat, tiket flight etc. buat local pun ok, lepas tu baru pegi bercuti la.hehe =) it's just a plan, hopefully i pass my ObGyn and also Community!aminn.. budak group lain dah wish 'welcome to 5th year' after our group finished Paeds and Psych the other day, but..anything is possible. tapi orang kate, bersangka baik sesama manusia, bersangka baik dekat Allah s.w.t jgk. InsyaAllah, sume akan ok. Kalau tak ok pun, mula2 je, ade hikmah di sebaliknye.

I got my first wedding invitation the other day tp sayangnye tak dapat pegi. Tempat jauh, masa pun xsesuai coz tgh ade klas. Macam tak percaya je skg ni dah musim people my age getting married. haha. Ade je yang dah kahwin lagi muda tp bile rmai2 sekaligus nak kawin ni..isk..haha.takdela, hopefully sume bahagia la. lagipun belum ade mmber2 rapat yang kawin, so kire ok lagi la tu. yeah. 'Don't get attracted to external factors only'. ^-^~

*currently listening to The Script- I'm Yours :)

Moved

I have 1 day before starting new posting: ObGyn (or also known as, 'scary posting', 'stressful posting', 'mind-physical-emotionally challenging posting' etc) haha..that's what i heard from my friends from the group that had finished the posting. Anyway, I've decided to continue writing in this page, and stop writing in Friendster. Saje je, kat sini boleh link2 dengan page orang lain. I don't know if FS can, malas nak explore.

FYI, I have an account a year ago (if you check my archives) but then I forgot my password and completely forgot that I have an account. It's just today only I remember and decided to use blogspot. I was reading and following this blog regarding Sejarah Nagara Kedah, Empayar Islam Benua Siam Kedah~ it's very interesting, just started reading today. I am interested in history, it's one of my favorite subject at school. But after reading a few articles from the page, I think it's a waste if what we learn from school is just another twisted stories made up by those who have things to hide. Hurm.

I'm still 2 years behind from the recent posts. Got lots more to catch up. ObGyn lagi to come. 1 more day....chaiyok2!:)

LOVE~

I'm writing today sempena 14th February, aka Love Day..ye ke? I don't know, but it was supposed to be a day with red roses, cupid and everything red. Hm. I definitely don't and won't take part in such day..

Last week I was too bored I answered some quizzes in FB, haha. One of it is 'What type of girlfriend are you?' and my result is I am the 'Dream Girl'.haha. I wish that's true..anyway, what i'm highlighting today is the one with title ' Why are you still single?'. They say I was "Not trying hard enough". Huhu.So how? what should I do? How hard should I try? I don't even know the answer.

Well, I do have a crush on one person right now. It's been a long time ago, but I don't know whether I can say it is real because we have not meet each other in person. I'm not going to ask him, because it's against my principles even though I do hope to meet him. Contradicting statement isn't it? I don't know, it's something like 'I want but I don't want' thing. But, i'm satisfied with our situation right now, as long as he still wants to talk to me, I feel thankful enough. The last thing I ever want in my life is for him to avoid me and if it happens after I tried taking a step closer, I'll regret it for the rest of my life. So, I choose not to try hard enough coz I'm scared of the possible negative consequences. Does that make me a loser? For not trying? I don't know, but you live with what you believe. I believe thing will be just fine for me. I can't even tell whether my feelings are real, but it gives me comfort and good feelings just to see him.Haha. And I believe when it's time, there will be someone who will find me. Maybe he's already there but not aware of my existence. You'll never know. :P.

Anyway, the reason I'm still single is because I choose to be single. For now. But at the same time I'm just like any other girl, who dreams of marriage, family and love. It's just I feel like it was hard to concentrate on my studies and at the same time trying to figure out who the right person is. It takes a lot of time and energy, making me feel exhausted~emotionally.

What happened in my Year 3 really gives me a valuable lesson. The Professional II, Remedial Class and My Almost Canceled Trip. Gosh. That's when I decided to close the 'Love' chapter in my book (temporarily) and trying hard to be a good student and gaining my confidence to get through my med school. Medical school is important for me, for many reasons which I can't tell now. There's something deep inside that I know why it is important for me. It's not the money, fame or the title. It's more than that.

Oh, dah masuk Zohor dah. So, till here for now. I wish happiness for those who are in love. I want to send LOVE to my family..and friends :)

~currently listening to: Mirage by Pesawat